Beleive it or not, it's true! Jackie and Janet have written for FIFTY years! Yikes! That's fantastic! Read on... By Jackie Barlow, FL
Janet Paventy (then Venton) and I began writing letters to each other when we were both around 11 years old (we are six months apart in age). She had her name and address published in the magazine, Wee Wisdom (says Janet, "I had first seen the magazine when I was only about 5 years old, and loved it! So my mother subscribed for me"). Soon after I saw her request for a pen pal, we began what was to become a life-long special friendship that we treasure deeply.
Our first letters were about family, friends, holiday special events and school. In her picture, Janet is wearing her new "first day at junior high school" outfit.. (Janet added, "The neighbors' house in the picture was torn down a few years later and replaced by a big colonial style home.
The same people lived there from when I was about 9 all through my growing-up years. Now the son David, 4 years younger than me, and his wife live there.")
You'll also see in her picture that she is holding her kitty, Comfort. Remembers Janet, "I think I must have been 7 when she was born. When our mother cat had kittens, this one was like a baby to me: she would lie on her back in my arms, with her little paws up in the air; and since she was always so comfortable (and comforting), I named her Comfort!!! The next summer, when I was 8, was a hard time for me: my mother was very ill and in and out of the hospital a lot. That fall we stayed with my grandmother for a couple of months because I had rheumatic fever and my mother was back in the hospital. Neither Comfort nor I got along very well with my grandmother (although I grew to appreciate her when I was a little older). When we were ready to move back to the farm in November, Comfort had been off on an extended 'cat vacation' after a disagreement with my grandmother, and I was afraid we were going to have to leave without her. On the day we were leaving, I was sitting in the front seat of the car, crying - and Comfort came walking up the sidewalk to go with us! I held her all the way home, with tears streaming down my face. She lived a long and prolific life!"
At first neither Janet nor I were interested in boys. Then, of course, we DID GET INTERESTED - did we ever! Janet even remembered the name of MY first boyfriend! For years, our letters spelled out every detail of who looked at whom, who said what, what happened at each social function, and on and on and on!
We both loved to read. I wasn't one to knit or crochet or do other handcrafts, although I liked to do thread embroidery. Janet spent hours trying to teach herself to knit, crochet and tat - none of which she is very good at! She also did embroidery.
I remember playing with paper dolls and their outfits, "ball and the jack', dominoes, jigsaw puzzles, tea parties with my dolls, etc. Living in the country, Janet didn't have many friends her age until she went to town to school in the 7th grade. Before that time, BEFORE TV (which they did not get until she was a senior in high school!), she played with her cats and dogs, dolls, and the usual games and toys. Whenever she got together with her cousins, they played board games by the hour (especially Monopoly), roamed the woods, and had outdoor games acting out long involved cowboy/robber type "stories"!
On her farm, Janet drove tractor during haying season in the summer form the time she was IO years old. She also had "chores": feeding the calves, taking care of her dogs and cats, etc.
Janet remembers that I used to include jokes, cartoons, and articles and send her a big fat envelope of stuff with my letters! I do that to this day! The song "X's and O's" reminds me of all the years we put "XXXOOO" (kisses and hugs) on the back flap of our envelopes! We also wrote "SWAK" often (sealed with a kiss)!
As the years passed, Janet and I graduated from high school and moved into the world of adults. I chose a secretarial course because typing, shorthand and bookkeeping had always been my favorite classes. Over the years I worked as a secretary in law offices, and in November, 1991, I obtained my long-desired Legal Assistant diploma. Janet attended teacher's college for one semester and loved it, but quit so she could "get out there in the wide world sooner". (Now she reflects that quitting college was one of the biggest mistakes of her life). After that, she attended Central City Business Institute in Syracuse, New York, for a one year Medical Secretarial course. She has since taken numerous college-level insurance courses and has her agent's licenses in both Property/Casualty Insurance and Life Insurance and was the manager of an insurance office.
We married at almost the same time (me in August, 1958, and Janet in December, 1959) and had our first children only a few months apart: Janet's son Steve was bom October 4, 1960, and my daughter Shari on February 27, 1961! (Notice they are even both "S's"!). I had Arnold June 13, 1963 (the same day that my sister also had a boy - an article on us called "The Sister Act" was in the Miami Herald); and Janet had Melissa on April 16, 1965, and Brian on July 20, 1968. Sadly, our divorces came almost together, too: mine in February of 1972 and hers in May of that same year!
As Janet put it, "Our parallel tracks separated a little when you remarried and I didn't. But still we hung together. We've always been there for each other as a sounding board and a sympathetic ear (or pen!) - how many times have I said that this was better than therapy! And how much it helped me to clarify my own thoughts just writing them down for you, but always looking forward to your answers and comments and insights. How much I would have missed if you had not been in my life!"
I cannot describe the joy of having a "special letter pal". That paved the way to my having many, many pen pals over the years and learning about other lifestyles, states, and countries. The town where I used to live here in Central Florida has a "sister city", Torres, Scotland, where I shared letter experiences with a couple of ladies, and where people from both towns visit back and forth and exchange newspapers, pictures, recipes and other memorabilia. In fact, both groups have fund raisers, and two high schools students go to Scotland for a month and two of their students come here!
More Snail Mail Pen Pal Stories here!
