Pen Friends -
Quality or Quantity?

Are you a quantity or quality letter writer?

Sometimes certain pen friends seem to place their biggest focus on the number of pals they write to. This is sometimes referred to as being a pen pal “collector”. “The more pals, the better!”, “I am now writing 75 pen pals!”

However, it takes time and effort to write a decent letter. And if you write too many pen pals, you may soon lack the time to write a decent letter! Your letters will likely become brief, quickly written narratives of the latest news. “I did this and I did that…” In other words, you’ll be writing a large quantity of letters but they will lack quality! When this point is reached, I fear the person has completely forgotten what postal letter writing was suppose to be about in the first place!

The letter-writing hobby is more than just jotting off a brief, hurried response to someone. It’s about taking the time to put your true thoughts and ideas into writing. It’s about sharing your opinions and feelings about life. It is more than just writing, “I did this and I did that…”

Efforts should be made to keep your letters from being too self-centered. It is not only about you! It’s about the other person too. It’s about responding to their letter by being interested in them and their life. Letters should be two-way streets, not one-way streets!

Friendship and letter writing have two definite things in common: they both require time and effort. And isn’t that what postal letter writing is about – making friends through the mail? Anything worthwhile in life requires time, effort, and sacrifice. Do you want a “collection” of pen pals, or a group of friends though the inky trail? I’d personally rather have 5 pen friends that write quality letters, than 25 pen pals that write quantity letters. Maybe my mailbox would be overflowing with 25 pals, but what would be the point if they were all relative strangers and no true friendships were being formed?

Everyone’s pen pal limit may be different by the way! For myself, I find that 15 pen pals is the most I can handle and still be able to write quality letters. After that, I just can’t seem to keep up and my letters loose their quality. That “magic number” will vary from person to person.

I encourage you to find your magic number and stick with it! Don’t get so obsessed with having an overflowing mailbox that you forget what letter writing was supposed to be about in the first place. If you have gotten off target in this area, it is never too late to improve!

The next time you pick up a pen, remind yourself of what true friendship is all about. Slow down. Refocus. And you will be rewarded with some wonderful pen pal friendships!